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How IVF Helped Us Grow Our Family After Cancer: Heather & Mike's Story

Not all fertility journeys are easy. For Heather and Mike, holding onto hope and pursuing IVF helped make their dream come true.

April 2nd, 2025 | 9 min. read

By Sierra Dehmler

Heather and Mike's path to parenthood was filled with unexpected diagnoses, challenges, and triumphs. From battling infertility and breast cancer to finally welcoming their third child after a long five-year wait, their story is a testament to the power of hope and science.

In this article:

Meet Heather & Mike

Heather was born and raised in New Milford, CT, while her husband Mike was born in New York City and moved to Sandy Hook, CT in middle school. They met while working at Big Y, a local supermarket, and quickly hit it off.

After getting to know each other for a few years, they began dating, and soon realized they wanted to spend forever together. They started planning for the future, which they both knew included having children of their own.

The happy couple has now been together for over thirteen years!

Trying to Conceive With Endometriosis 

When they dreamt of the family they wanted to build, they knew they might struggle to conceive, due to Heather's early diagnosis of severe endometriosis at age 19. "I was told that I would likely never have children," Heather says. "Knowing this, we started trying to conceive right after we got married."

After months of failed attempts, the couple decided it was time to take the next step and reach out for professional guidance. They spoke to Heather's OB/GYN, who suggested they try Clomid, a medication used to help stimulate the growth of a mature egg in the ovary.

Thankfully, the medication worked for them, and Heather and Mike ended up conceiving right away! In August of 2015, their first child, Logan Michael, was born. The first-time parents were elated to welcome Logan and embraced their new roles as mom and dad.

Ready for Baby #2

Fast forward a couple of years, and the proud parents felt ready to expand their family again and give Logan a sibling. Unfortunately, this time around, things weren't so easy.

"We were tracking ovulation, tried Clomid for four months, and still didn't get pregnant," Heather recalls. "Our OB/GYN decided it was time to refer us to Dr. Joshua Hurwitz at Illume to have a more in-depth conversation about our fertility treatment options."

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Photo credit: Nicole Marie Photography

An IVF Cycle With a Shocking Twist

After discussing their potential treatment pathways with Dr. Hurwitz, Heather and Mike decided to begin in vitro fertilization (IVF) treatment, knowing it would give them the best chances of conceiving.

"We went through the IVF process and were blessed to get eighteen eggs at my egg retrieval," Heather says. "From there, all eighteen eggs successfully fertilized, thirteen progressed to Day 3, and we ended up with eight embryos total."

Note: The natural decrease of eggs and embryos during the IVF process is referred to as attrition. This occurs at each stage, from egg retrieval to embryo implantation, due to a variety of factors including genetics, laboratory procedures, and egg/sperm quality

The couple were relieved that their IVF cycle had been so successful. After their first fresh embryo transfer, they received even more good news - they were pregnant with Baby #2! 

But when they were just 11 weeks pregnant, the couple received heartbreaking news: Heather had breast cancer. "It was a situation we never could have prepared for," she says. "I was diagnosed with stage 2B breast cancer at only 27 years old."

Navigating Cancer Treatment During Pregnancy

At only fifteen weeks pregnant, Heather underwent a radical mastectomy. Following her surgery, her doctor also determined that she is a carrier of the BRCA2 gene, which drastically increases the risk of a secondary breast cancer.

A radical mastectomy is a surgical procedure that removes the entire breast, including the nipple, areola, underlying chest muscles, and lymph nodes in the armpit. In Heather's case, 21 lymph nodes were removed to reduce the chances of cancer returning.

Just two weeks later, Heather had a small, surgically implanted device (called a port) placed in order to provide long-term, reliable access to one of her larger veins. This is common during cancer treatment, as it makes frequent chemotherapy and other treatments easier.

Around twenty weeks pregnant, she began her first course of chemotherapy.

As she navigated pregnancy, parenthood, surgical recovery, and cancer treatment simultaneously, she kept her baby-to-be at the front of her mind. "My miracle baby growing in my belly gave me the motivation to persevere and be optimistic," Heather says. 

Welcoming a New Baby Amidst the Chaos

"I went through four rounds of chemotherapy while pregnant, took an eight week break, and then delivered my baby at 36 weeks and 5 days," she adds. "My induction was planned, as I needed to begin my second round of chemotherapy only two weeks after giving birth."

On November 28, 2017, the couple's daughter, Abigail Judith, was born. She weighed just 5 pounds, 14 ounces.

"After having Abby, I completed twelve more weeks of chemotherapy and 33 days of radiation," Heather says. "This was all crazy, insane, and overwhelming, but also made me realize that life could be worse."

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A New Vision for the Future 

While Heather and Mike had originally planned on having four children, they quickly realized that life doesn't always happen according to plan.

"My oncologist recommended that I go on a hormone suppressant for five consecutive years to reduce the chances of the cancer returning," Heather shares. "This meant that we would have to put off growing our family."

As they tried to absorb this news and adjust their expectations for the future, they also had to learn to juggle the joys and challenges of raising two small children. Their lives continued to get busier as Heather focused on rebuilding her health and Logan and Abby grew.

Will the cancer come back?

"In 2019, I had another cancer scare with one of my ovaries, and we decided it was best for me to undergo an oophorectomy to remove both of my fallopian tubes and ovaries," Heather says. "Thankfully, we knew that we would still have the ability to grow our family in the future, as we had seven remaining embryos safely stored at Illume."

The family of four navigated yet another major surgical procedure for Heather, and slowly regained their sense of normalcy. 

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The Next Stage of Their Journey

Fast-forward to 2023: Heather had completed her five-year course of exemestane, a drug used to treat estrogen receptor-positive breast cancer by lowering the amount of estrogen in the body. After a long wait, the couple was finally cleared for another embryo transfer.

"Once we decided we were ready to expand our family once more, we met with Dr. Hurwitz and quickly began a frozen embryo transfer (FET) cycle," Heather says. Luckily, their first FET cycle went smoothly and resulted in a positive pregnancy test.

Silver Linings

"Something I find super special is that we found out we were pregnant with Baby #3 on our daughter Abby's sixth birthday," Heather shares. "Had we not struggled to get pregnant with her, we might not have been able to have our third!"

They feel that the timing of their challenging journey was a blessing in disguise. "If I had been diagnosed with cancer before becoming pregnant with Abby, we likely wouldn't have had enough time to do an egg retrieval," she adds.

The Arrival of Baby #3

On August 2, 2024, Heather and Mike welcomed their third child (and second IVF baby), a daughter they named Hannah Elizabeth. "She has been the absolute perfect addition to our family and we couldn't be more thankful to the entire team at Illume Fertility for helping us get her here," Heather says.

Big brother Logan and big sister Abby were thrilled to add a little sister to their sibling crew.

Heather's Tips for IVF Patients

During her IVF journey, Heather read books on secondary infertility and joined various support groups, but found that the best medicine was making time for things she enjoyed.

"The best advice I could give someone is to maintain your passions when you're stressed about creating a family," she shares. "I can't tell you to try 'not to think about it' because I know how all-consuming the process is."

A few tips from Heather:

  • Do your best to put your own mental health and wellbeing first.
  • Continue to do things that are just for YOU.
  • Read, write, draw, exercise - whatever you enjoy!
  • Schedule regular girls' nights to stay connected with friends.

Finding Joy in the Juggle

"Life these days is crazy!" Heather admits.

With a 9-year old son, 7-year old daughter (whom Heather calls her 'warrior baby'), and a growing 6-month old baby girl, there's never a dull moment in their house. "Our kids are silly, wild, energetic, loving, sarcastic, messy...and we wouldn't have it any other way," she says.

Heather also feels grateful for the support and guidance she and Mike received from their Care Team at Illume Fertility. "The treatment I received at Illume was nothing short of incredible - between both pregnancies, my health scares, and so much more, I always felt heard and valued as a patient."

Sierra Dehmler

Sierra Dehmler is the Content Marketing Manager at Illume Fertility, having joined the team in 2020. Combining empathy gained on her personal journey with her professional experience in marketing and content creation, she aims to empower and support other fertility patients by demystifying the fertility treatment process.

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