Infertility and fertility treatment are often compared to either a roller coaster or a Ferris wheel, and for good reason. Throughout your journey, there are many twists and turns, ups and downs - and it often feels like the entire thing is out of your control.
That got us wondering, “If all the pieces of fertility treatment were like rides at an amusement park, which ones would they be?”
But that doesn’t mean we can’t occasionally have a good laugh along the way.
As you read, know that while the metaphors here are meant to inject some humor, we will also (seriously) discuss what we do and don't know about fertility, and how to navigate the roller coaster that is infertility.
We know just how frustrating it is to feel like you don't know what lies ahead, and we also have a sneaking suspicion that fertility treatment might have more than a few things in common with amusement park rides than you'd expect.
➡️ Related: New Fertility Patient 101 Guide (everything you need to know)
So, let’s look at a few "old favorites" that one expects to find at the amusement park of infertility, shall we? (A special thank you to our Ladies Night In participants for helping pick the winners for each category!)
Dr. Laura Meyer will also add her wisdom and expertise to explore what we DO know and what you can expect during fertility treatment - so be sure to read all the way to the end.
Insert drum roll here...
We can all agree that we love hearing good results during fertility treatment - those are the high points. And we’re devastated when we hear results that are disappointing - those are the unexpected, stomach-dropping dips on this ride.
Here are some thoughts that add to the roller coaster of fertility treatment:
➡️ Related: What Are My Chances of Success with Fertility Treatment?
The Ferris wheel is usually considered a pretty benign, gentle ride, right? Sure, unless it won’t let you get off. Then you're just stuck, going around and around in circles. What does that look and feel like when it comes to fertility treatment?
➡️ Related: 8 Ways to Manage Stress During Fertility Treatment
Oh yeah, let’s go with this one! This is the ride that makes you feel completely off-balance, like you have no anchor to the world. Fun? Not so much.
Here are some thoughts that might be running through your head:
A very common internal struggle for many of us dealing with fertility issues is “I don’t want to talk about this" or “I want to talk to everyone about this.”
Sometimes we want to talk about infertility, sometimes we don’t. Sometimes when we do feel like talking, we don't know who to go to, or worry that if they say something hurtful, we won't know how to respond.
And that’s often just the beginning. A few more examples of how the world can feel smaller when you’re challenged by infertility...
Do you ever feel like you’re drowning as you navigate trying to conceive, understanding your treatment options, finding the right doctor or fertility practice and then you're expected to learn a brand-new language: the language of infertility.
HSG, FSH, AMH, A1C, IUI, IVF, FET, ET, PGTA, HCG...how are you supposed to keep track of what all of these acronyms mean?Is it all in the way you look at it? Statistics always have at least two sides when it comes to fertility treatment, and it can feel like one's the winning side and the other is the losing side.
Land on the right side of the statistics and it’s a yes. The wrong side? It’s a no.
Here are some possible scenarios that may run through your head when looking at the data:
If you're naturally more optimistic (or trying to be), you can view the statistics this way:
We get it. Statistics can really suck. But knowing what your odds of success are can help set expectations, give you a better understanding of what might work best for you and make you feel more empowered throughout your fertility journey.
➡️ Related: Why You Should Have Hope After Failed IVF
Here's what our lives often look like when we try to make plans as people going through fertility treatment:
All or some of these unknowns may run through your mind and heart throughout the fertility treatment process. And we've barely scratched the surface - you know just how many more questions and worries pop up along the way.
Let's counter all those unknowns with some fertility facts and reassurance from Reproductive Endocrinologist Dr. Laura Meyer.
Lisa wittily and accurately captured some of the most common concerns that patients share on their paths to parenthood above. For anyone struggling to build their family, uncertainty about the future is often the most frightening and overwhelming part of the journey.
As an example, knowing the statistics about treatment success rates can be helpful for decision-making, but from an individual perspective, the outcome is binary (no one ever gets 30% or 50% or 70% pregnant).
So it's totally normal to wonder “How will this turn out? Will I ever be successful? How much of the outcome can I control?” While there are many “unknowns” along the path to having a baby, there is a lot that we DO know about factors that influence fertility and the success of family building treatments.
➡️ Related: Does Infertility Turn Us All Into "Type A" Personalities?
These are just a few positive examples of what we know to be true in the field of fertility care. Without a doubt, one of the most important things to know is that if you need help to grow your family, this is the best time in history to seek treatment.
If you are facing an infertility diagnosis, know that we have many ways to support and care for you throughout the process and to help you achieve your dream of having a baby.
There are many ways to find support while you’re in fertility treatment, including counseling, support groups, acupuncture, nutritional guidance, yoga and more.
These can be helpful mechanisms to manage stress and help us focus on the “knowns” rather than the parts of infertility that can’t be controlled.
Here at RMA of Connecticut, we have a robust Integrated Fertility & Wellness program that offers all of the above, as well as one-on-one support for patients at any stage. Don't hesitate to reach out for the support you need as you navigate this wild ride. It can drastically improve your experience and help maintain your mental and physical health.
When it comes down to it, wanting to understand all of these "unknown" and "known" aspects of the fertility process comes from the same place.
You want to build a family.
You want a healthy pregnancy and baby.
We want that for you too.
And if the amusement park analogy lightened your mood a bit or helped you see the funny in the (very unfunny) parts of your fertility journey, then we've done our job.
Either way, we’re here for you. Every step of the way.